In the morning when Insider wakes up, he likes to see the sun in his bedroom or at least daylight. His best friend is just the opposite. She not only hates the sun, she hates any kind of light in his bedroom, and it doesn’t matter what time of day. The old guy calls her room the Tomb. The old guy spent a lot of money making her room warm and attractive with blinds and curtains for opening and closing around the windows. He could have saved the money and effort, for from day one the blinds and curtains were closed tightly and permanently and haven’t been touched since. Hell, his friend even has to turn the light on when she goes into the room at high noon.
Insider has known other people with this affliction. One guy he bunked with in the service used to tuck towels across the bottom of the bedroom door to keep out the light from the hallway. Then there was the guy who couldn’t sleep in a dead quiet bedroom. He always brought an electric box that hummed every time he visited the old guy. Insider is somewhat in this category. He seems to sleep better on a blustery, windy night or when he can hear rain pattering on the tin roof.
Insider remembers his mother used to buy the cheapest alarm clock she could find. Not for economy’s sake, but for the ticking. She couldn’t sleep properly without a ticking clock on the nightstand. Even used to take it with her when she went on vacation. Those cheap old clocks could be heard throughout the entire house, and many a night the young guy would lie awake wondering if he could sneak down the highway and silently close her bedroom door. Insider buried his mother many years ago and at the last minute he thoughtfully slipped her alarm clock into the casket. He likes to think it’s still ticking today.
It usually takes the old guy about two hours to get to sleep every night, along about 2:30 a.m. His friend, God bless her, hits the pillow and is gone in 30 seconds, followed by vigorous snoring the rest of the night. The best sleeping is under a pile of warm blankets on a cold winter morning, preferably on a work day for most people. The worst sleeping is to dream you couldn’t get to sleep and to wake up realize it was not just a dream.