Over the last eight years, this column has served as an exception to the rule in the media industry that you only hear feedback when it’s back negative.
Since I’m away on vacation this week and had a space to fill ahead of time, I thought I would share some of the comments I have received over the years. I did not ask the writers for permission so I will leave off their names. This is not intended to be self-serving. If you know me, you understand I’m my biggest critic.
It’s more about what I perceive as the many positives to opening my heart and life to you on a weekly basis. It’s refreshing to me when I receive these letters because it confirms while we all have our individual struggles and joys from raising children we are all charting the same course, even if it’s in unique ways and different time periods. We can commiserate and celebrate together.
•I always read your Fatherhood columns with a chuckle in my soul being the parent of two sons (now grown). Oh how well I remember when my older son put all the spelling words into one long sentence. I said that I don’t think that’s what he was supposed to do. His reply? “I don’t mind!” His teacher minded and he spent the next day’s recess writing sentences. He is actually a history teacher now, quite adept at reading, writing and all things educational. That was nearly 30 years ago. Some things never change.
•My Dad loved your “The Adventures of Fatherhood” column. For many years, he’d call on Friday evenings and say, “Let me read you Steve Green’s article.” “I’ve already read it, Dad…” but he’d cut me off mid-sentence and read it to me anyway. Then he’d tell me what memory it triggered for him, as reading it often brought back memories of when we were kids, and when he was coaching youth soccer.
… Cataracts hindered his eye sight, and with his health issues, he could no longer get out to pick up the papers himself, so I brought them to him every Friday. Reading them took longer because of his failing vision, and often he’d get frustrated and put the paper down. He always finished your column, though. He’d laugh and shake his head, and say, “those boys!” or he’d grin as he closed the paper.
… Today is the first Friday since you’ve been writing the column that Dad hasn’t read or heard it. He passed away on Nov. 20, leaving us all terribly heartbroken.
His obituary appears on page 40 of The Dispatch today: Stephen Hornatko, 77, Selbyville. He’d be happy that his column isn’t too far away from yours. Thank you for the few minutes of joy you brought my Dad every Friday for years. From what I read, you’re shaping up to be a great father, too. Your boys will never forget it.
•I just read your open letter to Surfers Healing and can relate to every sentiment. Our son is also nonverbal. This was his fifth (very hard to believe) time participating. I remember the first year like it was yesterday … the anxiety, relief, extreme emotion, tears (from all of us). We were hooked immediately. Our son fought like a banshee when they were putting on the vest (the volunteers said not to worry that he was punching them, it was ok). He fought even harder when hoisted on the board and bobbing at the break waiting on a wave. I was a wreck. I was ready to call it off, then wham. He got his first wave and he went from anxious boy to elated human being in about a millisecond. We haven’t looked back since. He’s had good years and “bad years” (only in the sense that he was not into it, the waves were too violent, etc.), but this year was his best. And it never gets old. What you feel now will be exactly how you feel each time you do it, regardless of the “outcome”. To witness the service that the volunteers give, to be at home on a beach where everything that happens is fine, understood, is almost unspeakable. And, yet, you found the words. Well done. Best of luck on your continuing journey.
•I always enjoy your Adventures in Fatherhood column but today you had me crying into my coffee cup. It was such a beautiful article and I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experiences and feelings. Big hugs and fist pumps to Carson for his awesome surf skills and fearlessness.
•Being a young man aspiring to be a father someday this just really put a smile on my face just thinking about all the times I had with my dad. Definitely looking forward to the next one. Being a young musician/aspiring writer myself I thought it was incredibly well written I could not take my eyes off of it. That man has a great talent indeed
•We thoroughly enjoy keeping up with you, Pam and the boys as your family experiences the everyday adventures of living and growing up in a loving household. We admire you and Pam so much for all you do for and with the boys.
We know from experience it is not always an easy task to prepare and provide for the needs of growing children. Beckett and Carson seem to be real charmers. Definitely, Carson successes and progress are a result of the love and guidance you and Pam surround him with daily. Beckett certainly fills the bill of the big brother – the protector. What a wonderful life they have ahead of them as pals and guardians of each other. We will look forward to more ventures of the “Green Boys” in the future.
•I loved your Adventures of Fatherhood this week. Being the sister of two special needs children and growing up in an era when people were not as understanding of special needs because of ignorance, I loved this column. The “Welcome to Holland ” essay touched my heart and my admiration for my parents grew which I did not think was possible.
•Just had to take a moment out to say what an outstanding article your wrote on May 9. KUDOS for sharing what pulls at any parent’s heartstrings, that of a child with special needs. I can only hope that other parents will read it and see what good programs are out there as well as the joys of having a child with special needs in their life.
Your quote from the unknown author was so true. Carson was given two exceptional parents. Great job, both on the article and as a parent.
•Just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your Adventures in Fatherhood pieces. I am a proud father of two young boys and relate to just about every piece I have ever read of yours. This week’s concerning the soccer game was one of my favorites and it’s so nice to know that all families suffer from trials and tribulations.