Insider’s best friend is a coupon clipper. She seems to really enjoy it every Sunday when she takes the paper and sorts through all the inserts to see all the deals. When she goes grocery shopping every other week, she takes along her envelope of coupons. It usually takes her about two hours to do her grocery shopping. The good news is she always ends up saving about $20, thanks to that trusty coupon envelope. The other day while she was in the powder room the old guy grabbed her coupons to see exactly what was in there. She had it very organized with little dividers to distinguish between those items marked for dairy, household supplies, meats, condiments, vegetables and the like. Insider’s beef with the whole thing is there are coupons in there that expired over 10 years ago. When she was asked about why she still has this $1 off Gas-Ex tablets, she said you never know when they will need it. When Insider pointed out it expired in 10/99, she said you never known they still might accept it.
While sitting in the doc’s office the other day for a routine eye exam, Insider noticed a young timer particularly fidgety. The old guy figured it had something to do with the fact the office restricted cell phone use or he could just be high on drugs. After a few minutes, Insider couldn’t help himself. “Are you okay?” the old guy asked. The punk responded, “yeah, I just get nervous in doctors offices.” The old guy can identify with that.
You’re an old timer if: you have no idea what braces feels like on your teeth; you know what channel the History Channel is: you have no idea what channel MTV is; you always carry a pencil with you wherever you go; you stop at stop signs; you enjoy each meal; ice cream is only something you can eat every once in a while; you go to bed at the same time every night; you prefer your shoes to be white; you are lost without your glasses; you think restaurant menus use type that’s too small; you think dating networks are for crazy people; and the Boardwalk this time of year is fun.
You’re a young-timer if: you have had braces on your teeth; you know what channel MTV is: you have no idea what channel the History Channel is: you like to use strange color pens; you wear long shorts; you don’t stop at stop signs; you eat fast; you eat whatever you want when you want; you wake up at the same time each morning; you think black is color; you would never be caught wearing plain white shoes; and you hate tucking in your shirt.