My Thoughts

The early signs of Autumn are upon us. The trees are starting to lose their strength. The green in the leaves is starting to dull. The moisture in the air at night is palpable as is the evening chill. Morning fogs are becoming commonplace. If you like nature, then fall is your time of year. It’s a buffet for the senses. Insider looks forward to summer all fall. It’s the season of not-too-cool nights and not-too-warm days. It’s a season of balance. Everything in nature gets balanced out this time of year. If it was a dry summer, a wet fall is sure to follow. If it was a wet summer, a dry season is next. Autumn brings everything into balance, and it’s not just about nature. It’s about life. Just ask a parent what it was like this week when his or her kid went back to school. They may give some politically correct statement about how much they enjoyed their summer, blah, blah, blah, but the fact is they are happy to get them out of the house for eight hours a day and relieved to turn them over to the county’s pricey babysitting service, also known as the public school system.

You’re an old-timer if: you read this paper from back to front; you like your cheeseburgers with little buns; you enjoy TV golf; remember Wilbur Buds; you remember black days on the Boardwalk; you ate a barbeque called Orey’s on 25th Street in Baltimore; you know what fluid drive was; you wandered the lonely sand dunes of Ocean City; you find truck-vans ugly; you look forward to bus trips to the slots casinos; getting the mail is a highlight of your day; and you read yourself to sleep most nights.

You’re a young timer if: you think truck-vans are neat; you put catsup on French fries; you think people are crazy for putting vinegar on fries; think McDonald’s is a great place to eat; you played soccer growing up; you wear suggestive or obscene T-shirts; you smoke because mom and dad disapprove; you drink to get drunk; you wear your hat backwards or sideways; you actually believe that only old people die; you must have a phone with call waiting; you don’t read unless you are ordered to; and you think it necessary to all the bartenders first names.