The world of youth sports is an interesting one.
Sports are important for kids. They teach many values that cannot be learned in the classroom or at home at a young age, including the importance of teamwork, hard work and commitment. Sports also allow kids to learn how to win and how to lose with grace. That last part might is a work in progress for my oldest son, Beckett, who has been playing soccer since he was under 2 years old. He also loves basketball.
What he doesn’t like is lacrosse. He uses the “h” word when talking about it actually. That’s a dagger to my heart as I played in high school and college. Baseball is not his thing either.
His passion is soccer. In the hopes he will eventually warm to the sport of lacrosse, I don’t push it because I know that will alienate him further. Therefore, we are feeding his passion for soccer and that means at least three days of the week are booked, running from this practice or that game to another.
We don’t mind, but there are times when it occupies an entire weekend, leaving little time for anything else. That will be the case this weekend when he has two practices and two games. Sometime in between he’s supposed to get a team photo taken. I’m already assuming he will be a red-faced, hot mess for that photo, which I look forward to actually because it will represent a snapshot in time.
For his part, Carson is in his own youth sport called TOPSoccer, which is a volunteer-led training and team placement program for young athletes with disabilities. It’s a special program and we are excited for Carson, who has been relegated to watching his big brother from the sidelines for several years.
Mix all of that in with karate a few nights a week and other life challenges and we are oftentimes scrambling trying to juggle it all. We are not alone, as this is commonplace for many families these days.
That’s why an article I came across this week in Lacrosse Magazine was worthwhile to share because it contains some valuable advice to those of who might need a refresher on the proper perspective when it comes to these days of pooling kids from one activity to the next.
Here are some excerpts from the article, “Parents: Enjoy The Moment” by Kate Leavell, a high school and youth girls lacrosse coach who is now a parent:
“One day you’re going to get in the car with your kid’s water bottle that he left at home for the last time, that sour shoulder pads and cleat smell coming from the back seat, and the little chunks of dirt that have been knocked loose from muddy cleats all over the once new floor mats. You’re going to climb the stadium stairs one last time, listen to his name announced, watch him take the field and shoot a glance up your way and a little wave. You’re going to hear the last whistle, watch the last half time talk, the last hand shake, eat your last stadium hot dog, shade out that last bright sun beam blocking your view, and then you are going to get in the car and you won’t ever be back again.
Don’t miss the fun, don’t miss the laughs, don’t miss the chance to reassure when the tears come, hug him tight, hand him an ice pack when he gets hurt and then send him back out there. And when he wants a break, when he says he misses his friends, respect that request.
Don’t worry about what the coaches are doing, how the team is playing, who should be playing, if they are learning as fast as other teams, if they are a super star, or if they are winning. Just look at them – are they happy? Are they growing and learning and reaching and stepping outside of their comfort zone? Because at the end of their sports experience that’s all that matters.
There are so many opportunities that are going to get missed if he is training all the time. He doesn’t want to play in college, that was my destiny, not his. But the things he learned playing sports he will use every day when he leaves for college next year.
Soak in every moment of every game, absorb the cheers, the goof ups, the missteps, the sometimes less than perfect effort, the sometimes mind blowing plays, the team events, the mud, the smell, the tears, the joy, because one day it’s going to be over.
You’re going to miss the smell that you think you hate on that drive home from practice, you’re going to miss the constant shuttling to and from practice, volunteer responsibilities and team events, you’re going to miss all the time you spent worrying about team stuff instead of just relaxing and watching him love the game, you’re going to remember those Band-Aid moments, emergency room visits, got cut from the team and then, years later, the being made captain moments. Hold on tight, and remember why he is playing, never miss an opportunity to experience the complete and total joy you get from just getting to watch him play, because it doesn’t last, and it doesn’t come back.”