Adventures Of Fatherhood

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Laughing is healing for the soul.

Fortunately, I have a lot of it in my life, thanks largely to my kids and the unique way they approach things.

Since we all need some good laughs, here’s a handful of stories aimed at the lighter side of life.

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A casual conversation about how wild and crazy my kids are when we first get home from work the other day led to a quotable quote from Beckett, our 5-year-old who took quite the exception to being described as “wild and crazy”.

He said, “that’s not fair to call me wild. I’m not a wild thing like Max in that book … I am crazy, sometimes, though.”

——————–The old dog of the house had surgery this week, and he had all of us concerned.

Fletch is a 14-year-old yellow lab who has a special place in my heart. He is what I call my “first born son”. Through life’s many twists and turns, he has been a common denominator for the last 14 years. I treasure my old dog, even when he has me up in the middle of the night because of an accident, which has become more and more common of late.

The night of Fletch’s surgery I showed Beckett, 5, the incision he had and it freaked him out. His eyes started watering and he ran out of the room. He was spooked I figured.

Instead, he returned a minute later with a handful of colored straws, saying, “here Fletch, let’s play lightsabers. That always cheers me up.”

There he was trying to stick a straw in his paws. When that didn’t work, he tried to pry his mouth open and stick it in there. Beckett then started waving the straws in front of his face trying his best to pick a lightsaber duel. When Fletch showed no interest, Beckett turned to me and said, “oh man, he must really not feel well.”

For the record, Fletch and Beckett have never had a lightsaber fight in the past.————————–
There are times when Carson feels the need to get naked and it can come at inopportune times.

One such time was this week while coming back from Salisbury, I could see in the rearview mirror Carson was taking his shoes and socks off, and I didn’t even bother wasting my breath trying to encourage him to stop.

Carson then turned to taking off his shirt. I knew that because he hit me in the back of the head with it after it was removed. That was quite the feat, particularly considering car seat straps were involved.

He then turned to trying to remove his shorts and screamed for 15 minutes on Route 50 because he was unsuccessful in removing them. He was so intent I couldn’t help but laugh at him when I finally got out of the car in a local parking lot and had to redress him. He turned some heads, but it didn’t bothered him. He just stuck out his belly and gave it a few rubs.

————–On Father’s Day, on the beach, I had one of those moments of shame nobody should experience.

I sat down in an old beach chair and plopped directly through it to the beach. It was not a proud moment and confirmed for me this winter was a little long and rough on the old body.

As if that was not embarrassment enough, Beckett poured a dose of salt in the wound, saying, “hey, that was my chair, you did that on purpose.” He stormed off in a fit, while Carson stood nearby pointing and laughing. He continued that, and even mixed in a bent over knee slap for effect, for a couple minutes after I extricated myself from it.

In this case, laughing at myself with the kids was healthy for the soul.————————-
I was talking current events with Beckett Sunday in the pool.

He has a tendency to walk (and run) around the pool with his bathing suit falling off his hips, exposing his rear end, or a “full moon” in his terms. I told him Ocean City might pass a law stating pants or shorts cannot be too low. I joked he might get fined if he wore his pants like that in town.

He said, “Why would I ever wear my pants showing my ‘hiney’ so other people could see it?”

I laughed, telling him I am so glad you just said that.The conversation then diverted into laws, which quickly bored both of us.
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While on the beach last weekend, there were several moments when the kids were quite independent and actually went off on their own for a bit.

At one point, we noticed Beckett put his arm around Carson as they looked out over the ocean. I raced to grab a camera and snapped a photo before they knew it.

Well, later after reviewing the pictures taken that day, I zoomed in and was able to see that it was not as loving as we thought initially. Instead of having his arm around his little brother, Beckett instead had him in a vice around the neck and appeared to be trying to pull his pants down.  As I zoomed in further, I saw they both were giggling. Crazy kids, indeed.

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While conducting his personal business in the bathroom the other day, I heard Beckett screaming for me.

Fearing he was in pain, I was relieved to find him merely perplexed as he sat on the potty. He wanted to know why his feet did not touch the floor when he was on the toilet and if and when they would.

After my heart stopped pounding, I told him how they would if he continued to eat his fruits and vegetables, which help him grow. He then demanded at the instance some watermelon, but only if without seeds.

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